From the Home Office in Omaha, Nebraska: The Top 10 Differences Between a Men’s Federal Penitentiary and Club Med:
10. Foods that can double as construction materials
9. Communicable diseases spread faster
8. Complacency and apathy are normal.
7. Smells; enough said
6. Can’t find institutional grey in a tropical pattern
5. Limited mini-bar options
4. Employees are less focused on customer service
3. Location, location, location
2. Opportunity and means
And the number one difference between federal prison and Club Med is:
1. Women in swimsuits!
— Michael R.